So, I’m back with the last in the Ph.D. series, and, yes, I’m writing this post as Dr. Sandy Chris. It’s done! Yaas! Ah, but. Of course, there is a but. You think I got that tag just like that? Nah! Don’t believe me? Well, look at what I’d to do to be Dr. Sandy Chris.
The point is, as a Ph.D. student of this University, my job was done (apparently) with the submission of my thesis. And, nothing really happened for 13 months after that on this front. Other than the fact that I couldn’t really plan anything else. It was as if I was stuck at some stop signal in the Ph.D. journey.
But then, the lights turned, oh I don’t know, some shade of green must be ’cause I get the news that my viva may happen anytime soon, as early, in fact, as the first week of January 2019. Can you believe it? And there I’m, stumped, not expecting it. At least, not like that!
Ok, still ok. But, what about the fact that my guide is not around? I mean, in the country? Ah, but she’d already thought about this, and decided to hand over the reins of my life, I mean, Ph.D. into the hands of another teacher. Well, that’s fine, too! Like, I should be happy, isn’t it? And somewhere, yes, I was but that happiness came at an immense cost that included a deterioration of my mental health; digestive system gone for a complete toss because, obviously, who’s even hungry when your life is hanging there precariously, and zero value to my time (imagine running to and fro from work to the two University campuses! Hell!)
Running around from pole to pole became a mainstay as the (so-called) countdown to my Ph.D. viva was underway. Emotions and stress were running high. But that news came eventually, “Your viva is going to be held on Wednesday, January 23, 2019 at 12 noon IST!” OK, then. There’s that confirmation. Now, at this point, ideally, I should be focussed only on preparing for my big day. You know,the presentation, and so on. But, this is where I got jumbled in the “bureaucratic mess,” and, believe me, it was messy alright further adding to the stress.
And so, though, I did get my Ph.D., it came at a cost! A very heavy cost, indeed! So, yeah, it was a torturous way of life for almost four years of my adult life. In the end, I didn’t want to jump for joy or run around shouting to the world that it was done; it was just plain relief. A part of my life was over and done with for good . . .